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OPINION: Having a baby doesn’t mean the end of everything, especially for women with resources.
Editor’s note: The following article is an op-ed, and the views expressed are the author’s own. Read more opinions on theGrio.
St. Louis rapper Sexyy Red is pregnant.
She seems pretty happy with it, but when she first announced her little bundle of joy, folks on the internet immediately did that thing they do when a young Black woman announces a pregnancy during her ascendancy to stardom: They began projecting their own insecurities and fears onto her.
Some have asked why she would get pregnant while her star is still shining so brightly. Others have predicted that her pregnancy and the subsequent birth of her child will be a career-ending situation. And then there are those who openly say she is making a “mistake.”
This isn’t the first time we have heard these things said about a young Black woman who has made the decision to become a mother.
Keke Palmer faced similar scrutiny when she announced her pregnancy. She has since had her son and continued to boss up like only Keke can, proving the naysayers wrong.
When Cardi B announced her first pregnancy just as her first album was beginning to blow up on the charts in 2018, people predicted it would be the end for her as well. It wasn’t. Cardi continues to put out chart-topping hit after chart-topping hit, and she has even given birth to her second child with her husband, rapper Offset from Migos.
Cardi performed on stage throughout her pregnancy, most notably on “Saturday Night Live,” where her pregnancy was officially “revealed” and confirmed.
Not even Serena Williams could escape that type of scrutiny when she became pregnant with her first child. Even with as great of an athlete as she is, people doubted her ability to bounce back onto the court after having a child, but she did. She even won the Australian Open while she was pregnant, and went on to reach the finals at Wimbledon and the U.S. Open in 2018 and 2019.
There are rumors circulating that the Little Mermaid herself, Halle Bailey, is pregnant by her boyfriend, DDG. Bailey has not confirmed or denied a pregnancy, but that has not stopped internet “sleuths” from dissecting every picture she posts to try and prove that she is.
Along with said “proof” comes all the talk of how she will ruin her career by having a baby.
To be clear, having a baby doesn’t have to stop anything, especially for these young Black women.
Sexyy Red is currently on her “Hood Hottest Princess” tour with dates all across the country, and she has been proudly performing with her baby bump on full display, and a lot of time, she is doing so without her shoes on, which is so cute to me.
The biggest difference between Sexyy, Keke, Cardi, Serena and the rest of us is money and resources.
Rappers, movie stars and professional athletes have money and resources that allow them to have children and continue their careers comfortably.
When you can afford nannies and other types of help with your child, you can still follow your dreams knowing your child is taken care of and provided for.
Cardi B had her children and is a fully engaged mother while still topping the charts and performing wherever she wants. Serena is now a mother of two, and having retired from professional tennis, she is open to do whatever she wants. Keke is doing her thing, and the childish missteps of her co-parent aside, she hasn’t missed a beat.
Pregnancy doesn’t stop anything for these women, and why should it?
This isn’t 1982 or even 1972.
Women have tons of options now, having a baby while maintaining a career is a possibility for anyone who has the resources and the support system to make that happen.
When you don’t have those things in place, it’s hard for you to understand how others can do what you cannot, but your limitations are not theirs.
We need to stop projecting our own fears and limitations onto other people, especially young Black women who want to become mothers.
Monique Judge is a storyteller, content creator and writer living in Los Angeles. She is a word nerd who is a fan of the Oxford comma, spends way too much time on Twitter, and has more graphic t-shirts than you. Follow her on Twitter @thejournalista or check her out at moniquejudge.com.
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