I’m a huge Mary J. Blige fan. I’ve also never listened to an album in full after ‘Share My World.’ I apologize.

Entertainment
OPINION: I must confess that despite thinking that Mary J. Blige is one of our GOAT-level artists, there are entire albums of hers I couldn’t name. 
Editor’s note: The following article is an op-ed, and the views expressed are the author’s own. Read more opinions on theGrio.
I still remember when Mary J. Blige came into my life. I was 13 and the video for “Real Love” came onto whatever video show I had on a VHS tape. The opening beat break had me in a trance and the hip-hop soul of it had me entranced. Hip-hop soul is my genre, and my love for it is why SWV will always reign supreme as my second favorite singing group of all time right behind Jodeci.
Back to Mary, though. I was living in Germany at the time, and I remember all of middle school couldn’t get enough of her “What’s the 411?” album. I let the tape rock until the tape popped. When “My Life” dropped in 1994, well, Mary was the hottest thing smoking. “Be Happy,” the lead single from “My Life,” is still one of my favorite records of all time and still my favorite Mary J. Blige record, though “Everything” from 1997’s “Share My World” album is probably a close second. I bought “Share My World” the day it came out on April 22, 1997, and it is not unusual to hear me bumping that album even today. 
In fact, excuse me for a second as I go listen to “Everything” with my full attention because this song brings me such joy that I refuse to be distracted while listening to it — be right back. 
Back. 
Man, I love Mary J. Blige. I’ve watched most movies she’s been in and despite thinking that her character on “Power Book II: Ghost” is the worst mother in the history of matriarchy, I’m going to be sad when her character is either killed or the series ends, whichever comes first (my money is on her catching a bullet, though). The experience of Mary J. Blige brings me joy. 
And that’s why what I’m about to say is going to sound absurd: I haven’t actually listened to a Mary J. Blige album in full since “Share My World.” I didn’t even realize she had 14 (!!!!) studio albums. 
Panama Jackson
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Let me be clear: This isn’t some intentional avoidance of Mary’s later albums. In fact, I (of course) know all of the hits and have debated who, what, when, where and why a “dancery” is with the best of them. I know the hits. I just don’t actually know what albums they belong to. In fact, I think the problem is that somewhere between moving from physical compact discs (“Share My World” was the last Mary CD I actually purchased) and streaming, I stopped buying albums at all, so by the aughts, I had moved on from an album model to letting singles lead the way for me. I wasn’t compelled to go out and buy the actual albums (no shade) and that means I don’t know any more deep cuts. Unless Mary had a single that was banging in the clubs or on the radio I probably missed it. Now, I never assumed Mary wasn’t releasing music at all, I just assumed that her television and film career had taken over as it has for many artists. 
I still saw her perform several times over the years and there were some songs I didn’t know but when she’s doing runs of hits, I mostly know all the songs. That’s why I was so surprised to see just how many albums Mary had released in total. I was befuddled. I even felt a slight tinge of guilt for not being a faithful fan the way I thought I was. I even went back and tried to listen to some of the albums but there’s something about the experience of hearing albums in real time; Mary is one of the most relatable artists of all time so her albums feel like distinct moments in time. I have memories tied to those albums that I will carry until my final days. Since there aren’t any memories attached to her post-“Share My World” albums, just the singles, the albums didn’t quite hit for me the way I’d hoped. It was years before I even realized that the notorious Mary J. Blige Burger King commercial where she sang about chicken was based off her song “Don’t Mind.” That’s wild. That rhymes. I’ll stop now.
So here I stand as a devout fan of Mary J. Blige and an acolyte of her first three albums as one of the greatest three-album runs ever, and there are nearly a dozen other albums that I can barely name. It’s a paradox, for sure. Or maybe I’m just an enigma. Either way, my bad, Mary. 
What I do know for sure is that Mary’s early run was so amazing that it turned me into a lifelong fan, and whether I ever fall into love with the rest of her albums matters not, because for my life, Mary J. Blige is everything and everything is she. 
Panama Jackson is a columnist at theGrio and host of the award-winning podcast, “Dear Culture” on theGrio Black Podcast Network. He writes very Black things, drinks very brown liquors, and is pretty fly for a light guy. His biggest accomplishment to date coincides with his Blackest accomplishment to date in that he received a phone call from Oprah Winfrey after she read one of his pieces (biggest) but he didn’t answer the phone because the caller ID said “Unknown” (Blackest).
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