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In her upcoming memoir, the actress shares new revelations about her marriage, ongoing mental health and healing journey, and “The Slap.”
When Will Smith walked onstage during the 2022 Oscars and slapped host Chris Rock, the moment was shocking to many — including his wife, Jada Pinkett Smith. 
Ahead of the release of her memoir “Worthy,” out Oct. 17, Pinkett Smith is opening up about that moment, her marriage, and her ongoing journey with mental health in a new interview with People magazine. 
Of the Oscar slap moment, the “Girls Trip” actress said she, like many viewers, initially thought the incident was some kind of staged bit. “It wasn’t until Will started to walk back to his chair that I even realized it wasn’t a skit,” she said. 
Pinkett Smith said she recalls asking him after if he was OK. While the answer to that question is still a work in progress, she said, “I’m going to be by his side but also allow him to have to figure this out for himself.”
The actress told the publication she’s aware her marriage is a “topic of fascination” for many. Unbeknownst to most, the pair, she said, have been separated since 2016 and are “still figuring it out,” which includes doing “heavy-duty” work together.  
“We just got deep love for each other, and we are going to figure out what that looks like for us,” she said. 
Meanwhile, she said her children, Jaden, 25, and Willow, 22, whom she shares with Will, and her “bonus son” from Will’s first marriage, Trey, 30, are “little gurus.” 
“They’ve taught me a deep sense of self-acceptance,” the “Red Table Talk” host said. 
She added that her children show both her and their father “unconditional love.” 
“It’s one thing to want to be the person that gives that unconditional love,” she said. “And then there’s to be the recipient of that.”
Pinkett Smith also shared that she’s grappled with anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation throughout adulthood. During some of her darkest moments, she recalls driving around looking for cliffs so she could frame an accident to prevent her children from learning their mother may taken her own life. 
“When I turned 40, I was in so much pain,” she said, adding, “I couldn’t figure a way out besides death. So I made a plan.”
Help finally came when Pinkett Smith’s son Jaden approached her with the idea of trying ayahuasca after the father of a friend had tried it. His experience intrigued “The Matrix Resurrections” actress. 
“Ayahuasca helped me, it gave me a new intimate relationship with myself that I had never had before. The suicidal thoughts completely went away,” she said. 
While Pinkett Smith is careful not to endorse the casual use of ayahuasca, she added that her husband and now-adult children have also had guided experiences with the plant-based psychedelic known for its ego-busting transformative results. 
“It opened up a whole new world of healing that I’m so grateful for,” Pinkett Smith said. 
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