Kelly Rowland doesn’t shy away from talking about the messy realities of motherhood.
The singer and her husband, Tim Weatherspoon, welcomed a son named Titan in 2014. Since becoming a mom, Rowland has spoken candidly about the highs and lows in interviews, as well as in her 2017 book, “Whoa, Baby! A Guide for New Moms Who Feel Overwhelmed and Freaked Out (and Wonder What the #*$& Just Happened).”
In honor of her birthday, here are 20 quotes about motherhood from Rowland.
On How Motherhood Changed Her
“It has made me more bold. More courageous. I would do anything for my son to say, ‘Wow! My mom is this!’ Or ‘Wow, my mom is that!’ I really want to impress him at all times.”
On Writing A Book About Motherhood
“I wanted to give moms, including myself, some information on what exactly happens. I felt that I wasn’t prepared post-birth. As a matter of fact, I wasn’t prepared for everything that happened physically, spiritually, emotionally, mentally. With so many different components I remember thinking to myself, I don’t feel like anybody warned me enough. It was the power in knowing. Nobody tells you all those things [like skin and hair changes, dealing with aches and pains]. I wanted to talk about it.”
“I was growing a baby inside my body ― what could be more important than
that? And I just couldn’t get enough of the attention my friends and family showered on me. Everyone was always rubbing my belly and offering me the best seat on the couch and generally treating me like the queen of the world. That’s exactly what I felt like: a queen!”
On Postpartum Challenges
“In the blink of an eye, everything was all about Titan. And of course, that’s what it is to be a parent — that’s exactly how it’s supposed to be. I, too, was feeling the most incredible love I had ever experienced for that tiny little man who had just emerged from my body. But I was also feeling an incredible pain in my vajayjay and wondering if I’d ever walk again. I’d spent nine months so focused on the baby growing inside me that I was caught completely off guard when I discovered that, over the course of my pregnancy, I had changed, too. Like many first-time moms, I’d assumed that once I popped out the baby, I’d be taking care of him and that would be that. I didn’t realize how hard it would be for me to have a bowel movement or breastfeed or even sleep. That first day, for all my excitement, I was also feeling exhausted and overwhelmed and a little bewildered.”
“Of course, in many ways I had it easier than most people, since I had a ton of help from Tim and my family, not to mention that we splurged on a baby nurse during the first several weeks Titan was home from the hospital, which I still believe is the best money I’ve ever spent in my entire life. But even with all those extra sets of hands, I still always had one eye open and one eye closed.”
On Calling Her Doctor
“[After giving birth], I talked to my doctor all the time. No exaggeration — I had seven to eight questions a day for her after I had my son. She said, ‘You know, it’s crazy, but more moms have questions about what happens after [giving birth] than before.’”
On Titan’s Musical Interests
“He sings pretty much everything. Sometimes when I have my voice lessons, he likes to do the lesson with me or stay close so he can do all the exercises with me, like scales.”
On Raising A Son In The Public Eye
“I don’t think he understands or gets it yet, which makes me happy. I try to make it seem like everything is as normal as possible. It’s not really that way, but it’s his world. If there is something that I don’t want him to see, I just don’t have him around it. My husband and I love taking him to concerts. The last concert he went to was his Auntie BB’s [Beyoncé’s] concert. It was the first concert that he went to. He was just so excited about it. Of course, we want him to see that this is his world. It’s awesome to watch him grow up in it and see things that happen around him.”
On Postpartum Breasts
“All that gnawing at your nipples will take its toll! In those early days, I was fascinated (my polite way of saying ‘horrified’) by the transformation of the boobs. My nipples were HUGE ― we are talking the size of Frisbees ― and sometimes I could see these veins bulging out while I was nursing. My boobs themselves were so long and stretchy that I sometimes felt like I could’ve swung them over my shoulders.”
On Embracing The Uncertainty
“One of the most helpful things a girlfriend told me when I was expecting was that we don’t get a manual for parenting; it’s all about on-the-job training. So much of this you just learn as you go. Every parent is different and so is every child, so you can read all the books and scribble down all the advice you want, but you’re not going to know what to do until you’ve got that baby in your arms. And even then you still might not know — and that’s totally OK!”
On Finding The Right Doctor
“I remember talking to a girlfriend of mine and she said, ‘I’m just not sure about my doctor.’ And I told her, ‘Then you have to start looking for a new doctor.’ You want to find the right person to help you bring a new life into this world. You have to be completely comfortable and relaxed. If you’re not, that experience is going to be a little more stressful for you and your baby and you don’t want that. This is advice I got from about four separate moms, actually.”
“Breastfeeding was a challenge, and the pediatrician that I went to go see at that time, I remember she just threw my self-esteem about it all the way in the dumps. I remember thinking to myself, ‘Why can’t I get this right?’”
“I was nervous that I didn’t have the patience to be a good mom, because before Titan I had zero. But now I am very patient. The Bible verse ‘love is patient’ is real! I don’t make the little things into big issues like I once did. My OCD had to go out the window. My living room looks like a freaking day care!”
On Postpartum Bleeding
“I literally had no idea how much I was going to bleed after I gave birth. Just no clue. It was like getting five periods at once. Seriously, the after-birth bleeding experience was like the heavy-flow day of my period jacked up to 11.”
“I will never forget sitting down for lunch with a group of friends when Titan was about six weeks old. One of my friends said something that cracked me up, so (naturally) I burst out laughing ― and simultaneously peed a little. I thought to myself, ‘Wow. There goes all my dignity.’”
“As I learned the hard way while still in the hospital, there is so much judgment out there for women who breastfeed or can’t breastfeed or give up earlier than intended, and it’s just not right. We are all doing the best we can in a huge range of different circumstances, and we all need to go easier on ourselves.”
On How She Unwinds
“Organizing. I know it sounds so crazy because it’s still some form of work. Literally, organizing makes me feel very at peace and calm. No one can organize my closet and my son’s closet like I can.”
On Watching Her Husband Parent
“In the weeks that followed Titan’s birth, Tim’s total devotion to the baby kept growing stronger with every second. Whenever I watched Tim play with Titan and look at him with total adoration, I really felt like I must’ve done something right in my life to receive such a perfect gift ― both the baby and the man. And when Titan got a little older and could respond more to his daddy’s adoration, well, that was even better. The smile that lit up my boy’s face when his daddy walked into the room just killed me! Still does. Seeing that deep connection they shared made me feel even more connected to both of them, if that was even possible.”
On Losing Her Own Mom
“It was a tough, emotional point for me. I remember not wanting to be sad for Titan. I wanted to keep myself together because I believe that all that stress and grief can be passed on to your baby. Knowing Titan needed me, and having that to focus on, helped me through.”
On Her Son
“The thing I’m the most proud of is the fact that he has his own little personality. It’s all coming together. To watch that form is so awesome because he’s such a smart kid and really sweet.”
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